My Musings
Email me if you wish. Sunday, December 01, 2002This Blog Entry Is Really Really Short, I Swear!To make a long story short—and trust me, I could turn this into such a long story that it would make you want to disengage your spinal cord from the rest of your body—at euchre club yesterday we were all talking about my last blog entry and Steven was like, “Huh? What happened with Dan?”, and I snottily replied, “Well, SOMEBODY hasn’t been reading my blog!”, to which Steven retorted, “I don’t READ your blog—my god, it’s so LONG!” That earnestly hurt. When Andy first complained about my blog’s propensity for digression and wandering, I wrote it off as lack of taste on Andy’s part. But I now wonder how I could have been so dumb. Though as a young kid Andy hated reading, he now reads more than just about anybody I know. So if there’s something he’s not willing to read, and he has a reason for not reading it, then perhaps the person who writes the thing which he is not willing to read should do something about it. It’s sad that it took another person’s complaint for me to realize this, but, I suppose, better late than never. There have now been two people who have told me that my blog entries are too long, compared to zero who have told me that they are either too short or of the proper length, so starting now I have imposed a limit of one single-spaced page, including spaces, on all my blog entries. Today’s entry—which, if you will note, is really only half a page long because I just wasted the first half of the page talking about how my blog can only be a page long, which if you think about it is a pretty dumb thing to do if you only have a page in which to write something, but then again, my brilliance, as Marina would say, knows no bounds—is about my spacebar. I don’t know the exact statistics here but I’m fairly sure that the spacebar is the most often-pressed key on the keyboard, and I use the keyboard a lot, so naturally I really love my spacebar. Unfortunately some members of my household don’t fully seem to grasp the proper level of respect that the spacebar deserves, so when I returned home in mid-July after three weeks at debate camp I found my spacebar broken. Somehow it had been unhinged in my absence, functioning only when hit square in the middle. Fortunately this is where I usually hit it anyway, but few things are as aggravating as periodically hitting the spacebar off to the right or left and having it not respond, forcing you to grumble and backspace and try again. You know it’s a sad world when a man can’t leave for debate camp without knowing if his spacebar will be whole when he returns. I asked Dan about it online and he tried to give me a walkthrough of how to fix it. While my fiddlings with it seemed to help a little, the poor spacebar was still depressingly broken. So imagine my surprise when at euchre club yesterday Dan emerged from my computer room having successfully accomplished in about 16 seconds what I had been trying in vain for four months. “Oh, by the way Boris, your spacebar’s fixed.” I could only stare at Dan in overjoyed shock and mumble thanks as I prepared to bow before him and kiss his feet. Regrettably I didn’t get that far because a pressing game of euchre could be heard calling us, but I would like to take this moment to thank Dan from the bottom of my heart for fixing my spacebar, and also to say that that I am nearing a page already, which means I must stop. If this upsets you, feel free to take it up with Andy and Steven. And if it doesn’t, then you suck, because I WANT TO KEEP WRITING THIS ENTRY DAMMIT BUT I HAVE TO STOP NOOOOOOOOOOoooooooooooooooooo… .: posted by Boris 1:59 PM
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